Know what I like doing? Biting off the heads of gummy bears and playing mix and match the bodies and the heads. I just had to get that out there. I think the coolest thing is that the opposites stick to each other and sometimes you can't even see the bite marks. I was doing that all night while watching TV. Ok, I'll shut up now.

I had a weird dream about Troy. Really weird. He was actually ...not stupid. He asked me out and I could've been knocked over with a feather. I ended up accepting the date and it was just weird. no more candy before bed. No more!

Eric called this morning. I missed it. I was still waking up from the Troy dream. He left a message and I called him back right away. He asked if I was coming in and that if I had time, he wanted to talk to me alone. I wanted to, right then say, "No, you don't. I really don't need to hear it." Only real reason I went into the office was to pick up my rent check. I wasn't there long. Kim asked what happened. I told her I didn't want to talk about it. And I was ambushed just before Eric made out the check.

"I feel bad. If I had to do it over I'd do it differently." Fucking duh! Of course you feel bad. Because I called you on it. If I didn't, it wouldn't matter.

"And I can understand if you're pissed at me. You should be." Well of course I am. But it really doesn't matter now, does it? So I'll just sit here and stare down at my fingernails to torture you a little and then say...

"...It's ok, Eric. Really. I read your email yesterday."

"It took that long to get to you?"

"No. No ...I got it on Friday. I just didn't read it until yesterday."

"I understand." No you don't. But y'know ...I understand how things are now.

"It's fine. I have to go."

Then I had to deal with his officemate and Jake as I left the office. If I stayed there much longer I might've ended up pulling a Carrie on them. Make them all suffer for making fun of me at prom ...errr....I mean for not inviting me to the wedding. Or maybe biting their heads off like I did the gummy bears earlier.