*swats the camera and microphones out of his face as he heads back to his apartment* ..... Yes ... its official. Danny and I broke up. And yes ... I'm taking the summer home in Cancun, the jag and the mercedes. Needless to say he's paying huge amounts in palimony. I'm taking him for everything he's got.

I joke about it now but I was anything but laughing last night. It wasn't even planned. He had aked me before if I liked Ricky and I told him yes. It wasn't like that though. I few weeks ago a told Danny that I didn't see it working. I was in a bad mood when I said it but it had some truth to it. We actually didn't really talk about it again.

It started out with me telling him about sleeping over at Mike's. I wanted to tell him before I posted the entry. Then we started talking about everything else. About Ricky. About the distance. About the need to have someone closer. It actually had nothing to do with Ricky. Yes I care about Ricky but Danny and I started drifting before I met him. I saw the way it would've been with Danny already. I'd be sad everytime he would visit and have to leave. I can't move to Canada and I know he can't move to New York y'know.

I want him to be happy. I want him to be able to be around someone he cares about as much as I want to. We're both young. We both need that company. Its ridiculous to think that we could make it last at this point. Its ridiculous to think that anyone can ... for too long.

After talking to him though and seeing that we were pretty much on the same page ... I felt weird. I did. I didn't even know what to feel. I just felt ... weird.

I had actually chatted with this guy Danny's been chatting with for a little while now. Jeremy. He seems really nice and he's not all that far from Danny. The guy definitely has feelings for Danny. Surprisingly I told Jeremy a lot of how I felt before I even saw Danny online later. I think in a way he helped me sort some of my feelings out.

"It's not like we wont see each other right?" I reasoned. I reasoned with him and myself.