I think I dreamed about Ricky before I even met him. I was checking the site the other day and ran over this entry. It talks about this dream I had about 2 guys. No! Not a threesome.

Seriously ... reading it though ... made me really think. And I mentioned it to him a while ago. Old dusty memory filing cabinets opened and details from the 6 month-old dream floated out. Dark hair ... like Ricky's. The smile ... like Ricky's. Seriously like his. Eerie but true. I mean ... maybe it means something. Maybe it doesn't. I remember the dream though and I remember being happy with him. The long talks. Walking with him ... in the fall. Ricky's transferring to NYU and will be here for fall.

I dotn necessarily believe in destiny ... but I believe certain things happen for a reason. Like we're on a giant chess board. Though we have free will and we're able to go where we choose ... I feel that sometimes we end up in a certain place, or fall into a certain situation for other things to happen. Like God's giving us a little nudge.

When I think back to it ... I didn't really want to come to New York last January. In fact ... I didn't really have a choice. My mom said "you're going" and that was it. I was only supposed to be here for 2 weeks. I even made plans with some friends for when I got back to the Caribbean. I had no idea at the time that I wouldn't go back until 6 months after. Its just strange the way things work out sometimes. So ... maybe it really was Ricky in the dream. What I didn't say in that entry is that I guess in a way ... I wanted wait for that kind of happiness. I did and I think I'm pretty close to it.