No one seems to answer their cell phones when I need them to. Pisses me off. I'm a little grouchy right now and feel myself slipping into a "Fuck all" kind of mood. I'm tired of everything and everyone right now.

It's a decent enough day otherwise.

I'm on the Weehawken water front looking at New York City which seems only a stone's throw away. The people here are interesting. Offices here are new so it's the lunch break crowd. Not the crowd I'm used to when in Manhattan. I sort of long to be a lunch break person. The type in a real office with real people. I actually really want to work nine to five. I want to feel productive. I want to feel I'm doing something and getting somewhere in life.

I feel life's shit for me right now.

I have no money. Well, I have about maybe a dollar with all the loose change I have at home. I doubt it adds up to that much though. My account is at -$15.90 with bank charges. Richie's supposed to deposit half of last week's pay later today. I'm hoping he does this within the next half hour so I don't starve to death or keel over, throat dry from thirst. Hudson River water looks good right about now. One sweet sip at this point, might almost be worth certain death.

I went to the cable office earlier to pay off the balance owed. Unfortunately, they can't reconnect because I'm not Mark. I think that's a little fucked up. They said, of course, that I could transfer cable under my name. I wouldn't have even had to pay the balance. I can't transfer it though and that instantly made me spiral. I feel that I was finally getting a break, I got Norm to send me a check (made out to Cablevision) to take care of the balance, and now it's fucked up. I'm even more pissed off at Laura. I don't really want her to have cable transferred under her name since: a) she's had her cable disconnected a few times before apparently; b) I want her out of the apartment by August.

Fuck.