I need a cigarette. I just finished watching two episodes of Sex & The City. Fuckin' fabulous. I swear ... I wanna be Sarah Jessica Parker when I grow up. It's almost as if they never went on break. I just love that show so much. I've loved other shows but I don't think a lot of shows came or will ever come close to Sex & The City. And ... it's not the sex part of it. It's really not. I dunno .. I think just being in the city makes me a part of Carrie and the others. It's as if ... I at least have that in common with Sarah Jessica Parker.

I also love the fact that even being as beautiful and glamorous as they are ... the characters are real. Embarrassing things happen to 'em. Like in the first episode tonight when Carrie already feels lousy cuz no one showed up for her birthday and drops the cake in the street. It was funny and at the same time ... sad. I see things like that happening to me. The way the workers were yelling at her and she's fumbling ... trying to scrape the cake back into the box. And the second episode tonight when Carrie fell on stage.

The writers do such a great job. And I love the fact that Carrie's a writer. Everytime I type my entries on my laptop now ... I think about Carrie. Sad but true.